KRISTEN'S BOARD
KB - a better class of pervert

Triplecharge · **Reply #3960 on:** April 04, 2022, 04:44:20 PM

Quote from: staci on April 04, 2022, 04:32:04 PM

Superman is flying around one day and he’s feeling kinda horny. So he finds Batman sitting on top of a building and drops down to ask him where the best place to get laid is. Batman proceeds to tell him that Wonder Woman is a great lay. Superman then tells him that he couldn’t do that to her because they have been friends for too long and he flies away.

Superman then sees Spider-man swinging around and flies next to him while he’s swinging and asks him who the best piece of ass is. Spider-man tells him that he hears Wonder Woman is good and tells him to look her up. Disgruntled Superman takes to the air and flies about.

He then notices Wonder Woman lying in a field naked and spread Eagle. He thinks I’m faster than a speeding bullet, I can be in and out of that so fast she’ll never know what hit her. So, he flies down does his business and id 4 seconds he’s back in the air flying away. Wonder Woman looks up and says “What was that?”

Invisible Man says: “I don’t know but my ass hurts!”

😂😂😂👍

Creepy · **Reply #3961 on:** April 04, 2022, 05:10:40 PM

Fantastic Four Headquarters:
Ben Grimm, the THING is walking to the kitchen,thinking about making himself some tacos.
He sees Johnny Storm, The Human Torch’s door slightly open and thinks about asking him whether he also wants a taco.
He walks to the door and opening him, sees Johnny naked on his bed, with a few semen stains in front of him. Unbeknownst to Ben, there also seems to be another semen-stain on the wall, behind the now completely open door.
Seeing Johnny like this, he says, “Jeez Johnny, lock the damn door if you want to get off! What if your sister saw you like this?”
Ben closes the door and walks away.
Suddenly the stain on the wall seems to move, as if it wasn’t on the wall, but on something, or more likely, someone invisible.
“Do you think he knew I was here?” Came the voice of Sue Storm, the invisible girl.

Blue_Eyes · **Reply #3962 on:** April 05, 2022, 05:53:40 AM

Quote from: staci on April 04, 2022, 04:32:04 PM

Superman is flying around one day and he%u2019s feeling kinda horny. So he finds Batman sitting on top of a building and drops down to ask him where the best place to get laid is. Batman proceeds to tell him that Wonder Woman is a great lay. Superman then tells him that he couldn%u2019t do that to her because they have been friends for too long and he flies away.

Superman then sees Spider-man swinging around and flies next to him while he%u2019s swinging and asks him who the best piece of ass is. Spider-man tells him that he hears Wonder Woman is good and tells him to look her up. Disgruntled Superman takes to the air and flies about.

He then notices Wonder Woman lying in a field naked and spread Eagle. He thinks I%u2019m faster than a speeding bullet, I can be in and out of that so fast she%u2019ll never know what hit her. So, he flies down does his business and id 4 seconds he%u2019s back in the air flying away. Wonder Woman looks up and says %u201CWhat was that?%u201D

Invisible Man says: %u201CI don%u2019t know but my ass hurts!%u201D

I actually heard a slightly different version of the story.

One day, Superman was flying over Metropolis and looked down and spotted Wonder Woman, lying on her pent house roof, writhing and undulating back and forth. She really looked "hot" so Superman swooped down beside her and watched at she continued her sexy moves and low groans.

Finally, Superman couldn't take it any more, so he pushed down his Super Shorts and hopped on top. Four hours later he gets off, pulls up his Super Shorts and says "Well Wonder Woman, what did you think of that?"

Wonder Woman said "Not too bad, Superman, but I don't think the Invisible Man appreciated it."

staci · **Reply #3963 on:** April 05, 2022, 06:02:09 AM

Yours is better

Blue_Eyes · **Reply #3964 on:** April 06, 2022, 06:44:58 AM

Quote from: staci on April 05, 2022, 06:02:09 AM

Yours is better

Why, thank you, my dear

(Assuming, of course, you were talking to me.)

purpleshoes · **Reply #3965 on:** April 06, 2022, 12:32:32 PM

I asked my girlfriend if I was the only one she'd been with.

She said, "Of course you are. All the others were at least a seven."

Shiela_M · **Reply #3966 on:** April 06, 2022, 02:54:53 PM

Oh my god. Best laugh I had in days. WOO(#200)

Creepy · **Reply #3967 on:** April 06, 2022, 02:57:58 PM

A man sunbathes nude and ends up burning his dick.

His naturopathy doctor tells him to ease the pain by dipping it in a cup of cold milk.

His blonde girlfriend comes home and finds him with his dick in a cup of cold milk.

'Good heavens', she remarks,

‘I always wondered how you guys reload this thing!'

msslave · **Reply #3968 on:** April 06, 2022, 03:17:22 PM

No wonder I've run dry. Heading to the store.

Creepy · **Reply #3969 on:** April 07, 2022, 01:03:25 PM

Quote from: Gina Marie on August 20, 2008, 07:52:18 PM

Beef is recycled grass

msslave · **Reply #3970 on:** April 07, 2022, 01:07:18 PM

MintJulie · **Reply #3971 on:** April 07, 2022, 01:23:27 PM

If Dan did that to me.......he'd die.

watcher1 · **Reply #3972 on:** April 07, 2022, 02:54:43 PM

Triplecharge · **Reply #3973 on:** April 07, 2022, 09:41:57 PM

I asked my wife if I was the only one she had been with.

She replied yes, all the others had been nines and tens.

staci · **Reply #3974 on:** April 07, 2022, 09:56:35 PM

One lesbian vampire to another lesbian vampire - " See you next month"

Hoss · **Reply #3975 on:** April 08, 2022, 04:32:16 AM

An Irishman's first drink with his son:
While reading an article last night about fathers and the sons,
memories came flooding back to the time I took me son out for his
first pint.
Off we went to our local pub only two blocks from the cottage.
I got him a Guinness. He didn't like it, so I drank it.
Then I got him a Kilkenny's, he didn't like that either, so I drank
it. Finally, I thought he might like some Harp Lager?
He didn't. I drank it.
I thought maybe he'd like whisky better than beer so we tried a Jameson's; nope!
In desperation, I had him try that rare Redbreast, Ireland's finest whisky.
He wouldn't even smell it.
What could I do but drink it!
By the time I realized he just didn't like to drink, I was so
drunk I could hardly push his stroller back home!!!

Mick says to Paddy: "Close your curtains the next time you're
having it off with your wife. The whole street was watching and laughing at you
yesterday."
Paddy says: "Well the joke's on them stupid gits, because I wasn't
even home yesterday."

ObiDongKenobi · **Reply #3976 on:** April 08, 2022, 01:46:44 PM

Quote from: purpleshoes on April 06, 2022, 12:32:32 PM

I asked my girlfriend if I was the only one she'd been with.

She said, "Of course you are. All the others were at least a seven."

and a woo

Creepy · **Reply #3977 on:** April 08, 2022, 06:35:16 PM

Read this joke on Quora

A.P. BIO CLASS GOING ON.
Teacher: Sperm contains some amount of glucose.

Girl: That means it tastes sweet, but it doesn't taste sweet.

Class:(huh)

Teacher: The sweet taste buds are at the tip of the tongue not at the back of your Throat

purpleshoes · **Reply #3978 on:** April 09, 2022, 01:42:39 PM

A wife decided to spruce up her sex life by buying some crotchless lingerie. Pleased with herself, she dons the panties and sits on the sofa in front of her husband, spread eagle.

"Are those crotchless panties?" her husband asks.

"Why, yes they are," she replies seductively.

"Thank goodness for that!" her husband exclaims. "I thought you sat down on the cat."

purpleshoes · **Reply #3979 on:** April 12, 2022, 01:01:48 PM

God: I've made birds to rule the skies, fish to rule the seas, animals to rule the earth, and man to rule over them all.

Angel: That's not fair. Who will rule over man?

God: It's hysterical, wait until you see. I'm calling it, a toddler.

Joke of the Day

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