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Joke of the Day

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Offline purpleshoes

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Reply #4140 on: July 29, 2022, 12:45:50 PM
A sampling of third grade humor *

Question 1: How do you cut up an ocean?
Question 2: What has four wheels, a bad smell and flies?
Question 3: What's big and red and eats rocks?

Answer 1: With a sea saw, of course.
Answer 2: A garbage truck.
Answer 3: Duh. A big red rock eater.

* Not intended as a commentary about the maturity level of any of KB's paying members.



Offline ObiDongKenobi

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Reply #4141 on: July 29, 2022, 12:49:51 PM

I swallowed a load of scrabble tiles a couple of hours ago.  There might be some vowel movement soon, but if I have to rush to the toilet it could spell disaster.

I'll get my coat......  :facepalm:

Princess, would you like to see it light up and hum when I wave it about


Offline Hilda

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Reply #4142 on: July 29, 2022, 01:03:42 PM
A sampling of third grade humor *
* Not intended as a commentary about the maturity level of any of KB's paying members.

I can't remember when I first heard it, maybe in fifth or sixth grade, but I still remember this silly riddle:

 What's long and thin,
 Covered in skin,
 Red in parts,
 Stuffed in tarts.

Ans: Rhubarb

~ Hilda the Humorless ~

You are just a thought that someone, somewhere, somehow feels you should be here.


Offline Freesnowden

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Reply #4143 on: July 29, 2022, 05:58:36 PM
How many South Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A Brazilian!

Byeeeeeeeeeeeeee



Offline purpleshoes

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Reply #4144 on: July 30, 2022, 12:30:01 PM

A man showed up at a costume party, carrying a woman on his back. She was dressed, he was naked.

The host looked at him for a long time and finally said, "I give up. What are you supposed to be? And why is there a woman on your back?"

The naked man said, "I'm a turtle." Using his thumb to point at the woman on his back, he added, "And that's Michelle."



Offline staci

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Reply #4145 on: July 30, 2022, 03:02:53 PM
blonde moment here, ???



Offline msslave

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Reply #4146 on: July 30, 2022, 03:23:57 PM
Like Staci said. Thinking there's some song involved that I don't know. Help us out Purple. ???

Well trained and been made compliant....by our two cats.


Offline Pornhubby

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Reply #4147 on: July 30, 2022, 03:49:21 PM
That’s MY SHELL.  Jeezus.



Offline msslave

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Reply #4148 on: July 30, 2022, 03:53:44 PM
 :facepalm:

The Beetle's song was going through my head but the connection never clicked. Dang that's funny... but a lot of work.

 :emot_laughing: :emot_laughing: :emot_laughing:

Well trained and been made compliant....by our two cats.


Offline staci

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Reply #4149 on: July 30, 2022, 04:08:18 PM
That’s MY SHELL.  Jeezus.


What kind of Turtle was it?
 ???



Offline Pornhubby

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Reply #4150 on: July 30, 2022, 04:08:48 PM
That’s MY SHELL.  Jeezus.


What kind of Turtle was it?
 ???

Soft shelled.  :emot_laughing:



Offline purpleshoes

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Reply #4151 on: July 31, 2022, 12:45:27 PM

(sorry, not sorry for the pun-ishment above.)   :emot_laughing:



My wife accused me of stealing her thesaurus.

I am not only shocked, but alarmed, appalled, aghast and bewildered.



Offline msslave

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Reply #4152 on: August 01, 2022, 11:57:45 PM
So I talk to myself.

And... sometimes we laugh and laugh. :emot_laughing:

Well trained and been made compliant....by our two cats.


Offline purpleshoes

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Reply #4153 on: August 02, 2022, 01:25:08 PM

I called the doctor. "Doctor, my wife is in labor. What should I do?"

Doctor said, "Is this her first child?"

I said, "No, this is her husband."



Offline MintJulie

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Reply #4154 on: August 02, 2022, 01:38:12 PM

(sorry, not sorry for the pun-ishment above.)   :emot_laughing:



My wife accused me of stealing her thesaurus.

I am not only shocked, but alarmed, appalled, aghast and bewildered.


Still laughing about my shell.
Liked thesaurus joke also.
As for the last joke, I'm willing to bet that Mrs Purple Shoes has referred to you as "acting like a 5 year old" at some time (probably many) since you've been together, so I understand the doctors confusion. 

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