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Offline Mike81

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Reply #1980 on: June 10, 2024, 02:57:47 PM
Thanks for the welcome! I'm definitely enjoying the site so far!



Offline watcher1

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Reply #1981 on: June 10, 2024, 03:32:54 PM
It might not be the hardest accent in the British Isles to understand (proper culchie Northern Ireland, from the countryside up past Ballymena or along the borders down in Fermanagh might as well be foreign languages, even locals can't understand them) but it's definitely in the top two or three 😂

Tell me about it. Many transplanted Northern Irelanders in my area and still, after all these years, I have a hard time understanding them, mainly when they begin to talk fast.

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Offline Mike81

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Reply #1982 on: June 10, 2024, 07:09:18 PM
Tell me about it. Many transplanted Northern Irelanders in my area and still, after all these years, I have a hard time understanding them, mainly when they begin to talk fast.

I've spent the best part of 25 years over here (off and on, nearly 15 full time since I left the Army) and I still struggle with the proper culchies.

A further confession - flicking through this site in work earlier had me needing to go to the toilets and let off some pressure  :D



Offline Pornhubby

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Reply #1983 on: June 13, 2024, 02:29:53 AM
I spent three days at Mrs. “It’s Complicated” house. Absolutely nothing happened. Which is fine with me, I didn’t want anything to happen. We had two pecks on the cheek, and a *very* brief lip contact kiss. But that was it. We slept next to each other, but nobody made a move for the other one. Again, fine with me.

Which is perhaps why I am horny as shit right now. I’m just ready to stick this in anything. So if anyone wants to come over and abuse my genitals, male or female, I’m not going to object. Just have your wicked way with me. Because I really need to get off.

”You can be mad as a mad dog at the way things went.  You can swear and curse the fates.  But when it comes to the end, you have to let go.” — The Curious Case of Benjamin Button


Offline Shiela_M

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Reply #1984 on: June 13, 2024, 06:11:35 AM
I’m just ready to stick this in anything. So if anyone wants to come over and abuse my genitals, male or female, I’m not going to object. Just have your wicked way with me. Because I really need to get off.

I'm not one for abusing, but I could be that anything you stick it in. Shall I go head down, butt up and brace myself



Offline MintJulie

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Reply #1985 on: June 13, 2024, 12:02:42 PM
I'm about to take him up on that offer.  71 hours now

---edit--

I thought I was responding to this post below, which is in the non sexual confession thread, which I read last night, and NOT him sticking it in anything.  Hahaha. Not going to allow you to plunge it out of me


Daddy likes to give a warm sudsy enema, and make his naughty girl hold it for five minutes, while he rubs her clit.
« Last Edit: June 13, 2024, 01:45:51 PM by MintJulie »

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Offline msslave

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Reply #1986 on: June 13, 2024, 12:54:22 PM
Just got in on Toe's pool. Guessing when Jules will announce her big release. ;D

A few years ago I was being hospitalized several times for a bowel obstruction. Usually 5-6 days. When something finally let loose a nurse had to check on what I "produced". One visit after several days I released a giant that really cleaned me out.

Guess the nurse was impressed as she told other nurses. Another nurse came up and congratulated me.
I took her comments in stride until she asked me, "What are you going to name her.* :emot_laughing:

Well trained and been made compliant....by my cat Neville


Offline MintJulie

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Reply #1987 on: June 13, 2024, 08:40:11 PM
It has to be my personal record ... 76 hours.

Didn't get a pre and post weight, but my god.  I'm surprised I don't need stitches.   



Sorry, I'm done with the poop posts for those grossed out by it.

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Offline msslave

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Reply #1988 on: June 13, 2024, 09:14:07 PM
No...no. Don't stop. We have a pool going on how soon it will.be. Naturally Toe is running it. ;D

Good luck  :emot_kiss:

Well trained and been made compliant....by my cat Neville


Offline Shiela_M

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Reply #1989 on: June 13, 2024, 10:19:03 PM
I'll never play battle shits with you!!




Offline MintJulie

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Reply #1990 on: June 13, 2024, 11:09:44 PM
11 o'clock.  76 hours., Bob.

Later, we were at the store and bumped into Dans doctor., who is a friend of his, and who he plays golf with once a week. F'n Dan says, "Jules has been trouble ...".  I hit him.  Wtf. 

Doctor says, "Trouble with what?"   

We're in the dairy section and nobody really nearby.    Dan  looks around and whispers, "Constipation." 

I wanted to die. 

Doctor smiles and breaks into a rhyming song, kind of.

🎶 On the toilet I sit
And get brokenhearted,
I'm trying to poop,
But only farted.  🎶

That's when I walked away as those two chuckled. 

Idiots. 


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Offline msslave

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Reply #1991 on: June 13, 2024, 11:15:10 PM
Ah... humor from bathroom stalls. Dan's Dr. friend had a good education. :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm:

Well trained and been made compliant....by my cat Neville


Offline Pornhubby

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Reply #1992 on: June 14, 2024, 12:04:20 AM
First off, there’s nothing to be embarrassed about. I promise you just about every member of this forum took a shit today.

I’m going to share this is Meme with you and then explain it.



This Meme has been jokingly passed around in my family for years.

When you’ve been constipated a while, you develop what I call “buttcrete.” It’s that hard as a rock bowel obstruction that is just murderous to pass. When you finally do, you feel like you’ve given birth.

But what about that week’s worth of surplusage that’s still in the pipeline? Well that’s “second shit” an hour later. Possibly “third” or “fourth”.  Hey, when you’ve got to go, you have to go.

”You can be mad as a mad dog at the way things went.  You can swear and curse the fates.  But when it comes to the end, you have to let go.” — The Curious Case of Benjamin Button


Offline staci

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Reply #1993 on: June 14, 2024, 12:19:34 AM
OMG

one of the originals


Offline watcher1

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Reply #1994 on: June 14, 2024, 03:19:55 PM
It has to be my personal record ... 76 hours.

Didn't get a pre and post weight, but my god.  I'm surprised I don't need stitches.   



Sorry, I'm done with the poop posts for those grossed out by it.

76 hours!  Wow. You had to feel very uncomfortable.   :o

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Offline Mike81

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Reply #1995 on: June 14, 2024, 08:10:45 PM
Ah... humor from bathroom stalls. Dan's Dr. friend had a good education. :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm:

My favourite was a portaloo on (I think) Salisbury Plain training area.

On the right wall (if you're seated) - "Look left"
Left wall - "Look right"
Right wall, under the original - "Look left again"
Left wall - "Look right again"
Right wall, under the first two - "Well done, you're playing thunderbox tennis"



Offline msslave

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Reply #1996 on: June 15, 2024, 12:44:07 AM
 :emot_laughing: Good one Mike.

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Offline MintJulie

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Reply #1997 on: June 23, 2024, 04:02:50 PM
Dan and I went for a late evening boat ride one day this past week.  It was too enjoy the sunset with a glass of wine.  It was hot and I said I wanted to cool off.  It was 20 minutes past sunset and was getting a bit darker obviously, but we could still see shore to each side.  I had the sudden urge to jump in the water, but no swimsuit.  What to do.  Then ZzTop's "Legs" came up on Dans playlist. 
I stood up and did a strip tease for him and in just my undies, dove in. Once in, I threw my underwear to him on the boat. 
I love skinny dipping.  I need to do t more often. 


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Offline msslave

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Reply #1998 on: June 23, 2024, 04:18:58 PM
Well we need pictures...ya know just for proof. :emot_laughing:

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Offline MintJulie

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Reply #1999 on: June 24, 2024, 01:22:13 AM
When the phone isn't working because of lack of cellular, it stays back at the cabin.  Otherwise, for sure I would have videoed it and shared it here.  Great tan lines you missing out on too.  Bummer.  ;)

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