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17 Year Old Girl Stuck by Lightning While Masturbating

Well Behaved Lady · 1730

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Offline Well Behaved Lady

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on: July 23, 2014, 12:04:02 PM
17 Year Old Girl Stuck by Lightning While Masturbating

http://stopmasturbationnow.org/weather/17-year-old-girl-stuck-by-lightning-when-masturbating/#prettyPhoto

(Stop Masturbation Now)— There is nothing more disgusting than the thought of a teenage girl touching herself. Well Nature agrees too. Jennifer Connery of Hoagland Nebraska was struck by lightning this past Tuesday while masturbating outside behind a tree. “We don’t let our kids masturbate in the home for this very reason so I guess she had to sneak out side” embarrassed father Winston Connery was quoted as saying when contacted.

According to medical experts the moisture between her genitals and her fingertips served as a conductor and caused a lot of damage to nerve endings there is a good chance she will not regain feeling in either. “She is lucky to have only been using two fingers at the time, it could have been much worse” Carol Rogers, pediatric nurse responded. “Right now I think she is just embarrassed that she had to learn a lesson the hard way”

Masturbation is a most deadly sin and children need to be protected from the temptation.


We are all going to hell :emot_laughing:

I know it most likely should be struck instead of stuck but that just adds to the comic value

The earth most definitely moved in this case







Janus

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Reply #1 on: July 23, 2014, 12:45:41 PM
I think this is satirical. ? ! # $ % ^ & * * ( ) _ +

God I hope it is. If it isn't then I really feel bad for this girl.


Offline TheciaMarie

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Reply #2 on: July 23, 2014, 02:55:14 PM
Now I know what a man feels when he sees another man get hit in the balls.
Reading that hurt right to my little happy place....ouch.

I thought I was into bestiality and necrophilia until I realized I was just beating a dead horse.

Offline Well Behaved Lady

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Reply #3 on: July 23, 2014, 03:55:45 PM
A new form of epilation, in a flash your hair just disappears


Bexy

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Reply #4 on: July 23, 2014, 03:59:55 PM
Quote from: Well Behaved Lady on July 23, 2014, 03:55:45 PM
A new form of epilation, in a flash your hair just disappears

Just one downside, the nerve endings in your fanny are incinerated too.  :o


Offline Well Behaved Lady

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Reply #5 on: July 23, 2014, 04:02:51 PM
Quote from: Bexy on July 23, 2014, 03:59:55 PM
Quote from: Well Behaved Lady on July 23, 2014, 03:55:45 PM
A new form of epilation, in a flash your hair just disappears

Just one downside, the nerve endings in your fanny are incinerated too.  :o

Just a tad!  :emot_laughing:


Bexy

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Reply #6 on: July 23, 2014, 05:05:07 PM
Quote from: Well Behaved Lady on July 23, 2014, 04:02:51 PM
Just a tad!  :emot_laughing:

I think I'll stick with my razor. LOL


Offline anvil

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Reply #7 on: July 23, 2014, 06:07:56 PM
Maybe the, um, powers what be thought it was so hot they had to play too. 

Or perhaps her Big O was so big it sent sparks flying!!

Deus subrisum stultusi et ferrari

Offline Katiebee

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Reply #8 on: July 23, 2014, 06:10:41 PM
Hoagland, NE is a designated place name. However, the originating report is from an anti-masturbation site. I think it is safe to call this propaganda, and an urban myth.  Or would that be a rural myth?

There are three kinds of people in the world. Those who can count, and those who can't.

Janus

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Reply #9 on: July 23, 2014, 06:35:51 PM
Quote from: Katiebee on July 23, 2014, 06:10:41 PM
Hoagland, NE is a designated place name. However, the originating report is from an anti-masturbation site. I think it is safe to call this propaganda, and an urban myth.  Or would that be a rural myth?

I read the article and I kinda thought it was a propaganda things.

I was thinking though that if this girl's little hoo ha was injured I would be happy to kiss it and try to make it better. LOL


Offline MissBarbara

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Reply #10 on: July 23, 2014, 06:51:06 PM
Quote from: Katiebee on July 23, 2014, 06:10:41 PM

However, the originating report is from an anti-masturbation site. I think it is safe to call this propaganda...


What gave it away? The fact that the site is named stopmasturbationnow.org or the fact that the article ends with, "Masturbation is a most deadly sin and children need to be protected from the temptation"?

:)






"Sometimes the best things in life are a hot girl and a cold beer."


Offline Katiebee

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Reply #11 on: July 23, 2014, 07:28:58 PM
The site may be satire, but some people who post comments there are deadly serious. Don't you love freedom of speech?

There are three kinds of people in the world. Those who can count, and those who can't.

Offline licksnkissez

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Reply #12 on: July 23, 2014, 07:52:00 PM
Quote from: Katiebee on July 23, 2014, 07:28:58 PM
The site may be satire, but some people who post comments there are deadly serious. Don't you love freedom of speech?


My favorite comment:

   Jesus_of_Nazareth // July 21, 2014 at 3:44 am // Reply   

Dude, My dad left me on a cross for a week. Cut this guy some slack.


 :emot_laughing:

Keep company only with people who uplift you, whose presence calls forth your best.
- Epictetus

Offline pokkets

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Reply #13 on: July 23, 2014, 07:54:02 PM
I still can't figure out if that site is serious or not...

Still the anti masturbation cross is genius...



Pokkets


(image removed for underage content ~ Coacheric)
« Last Edit: July 23, 2014, 08:27:19 PM by coacheric »


Offline joan1984

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Reply #14 on: July 23, 2014, 08:09:28 PM
http://www.mapquest.com/maps?city=Hoagland&state=NE

Mapquest found it, but not much to see.

Some people are like the 'slinky'. Not really good for much,
but they bring a smile to your face as they fall down stairs.

Offline pokkets

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Reply #15 on: July 23, 2014, 08:33:21 PM
My appologies for the picture.
:facepalm:
It was innocent enough and didn't cross my mind.
I won't let it happen again. 8)

Pokkets


coacheric

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Reply #16 on: July 23, 2014, 10:30:15 PM
Quote from: pokkets on July 23, 2014, 08:33:21 PM
My appologies for the picture.
:facepalm:
It was innocent enough and didn't cross my mind.
I won't let it happen again. 8)

Pokkets

All good


Offline msslave

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Reply #17 on: July 23, 2014, 11:11:42 PM
So, if this is just satire, can I still do it, without being smote by the hand of God?  I mean, next time I get hard, if there is a next time. ???

Well trained and been made compliant....by my cat Neville

Offline Katiebee

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Reply #18 on: July 24, 2014, 12:06:23 AM
In your case, it might mean the end of the world.

There are three kinds of people in the world. Those who can count, and those who can't.

Offline celticfeline

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Reply #19 on: July 24, 2014, 05:40:48 AM
There's a thunderstorm rolling through my area, i could go test the theory...you know for the good of KB...and science, yeah...can't forget science! Lols

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